Women and Their Hair & Feminity

Consider this….think of all the family, friends, co- workers you know and their hair attitude. Do you know of any of them who are 100 % content with their hair? I don’t. Hair is women’s nemesis and it seems that we are never truly happy with our hair! Long locks,short styles, smooth beautiful heads…hair, hair, hair.

My new neighbor Tammy has suggested this topic, coincidentally I have been planning to write about my change in hairstyles in a future post. While I’m growing my hair longer ( for the first time in 43 years), Tammy did just the opposite. She had her hair cut short, a radical change after having long hair. It took her a long time to do this, but now that she has acted with resolve, she’s happy with the cut. Needless to say, hair is on our minds.

Tammy boldly states that, “I would like to see women feel beautiful and empowered no matter what their hair style. I have a feeling many women need a reminder that hair is just that…Hair. It can grow out. There are wigs, hair extensions, etc. Why allow hair to consume so much of our time or let it affect our self esteem and confidence? ” Females cut it, curl it and dye it different colors. It’s a financial burden to upkeep their hair. Not only that, it’s an emotional drain on many.

Watch women on television, flip through ads in magazines or notice women at the mall. Many are defined by their hair.The problem is that society has falsely taught women that their beauty depends upon their locks and the longer it is, the better. Like other females, Tammy also believed that having long hair was more feminine.Why are so many women brainwashed that everything depends on perfect hair? ( This is an unreachable goal…there is no such thing as perfect hair.) They are taught at a young age that beautiful hair qualifies them as feminine and that is simply not true!

Tammy also says with conviction, “I wish for you to express to women that long hair does not define their femininity.”Instead of teaching that perfect hair is what makes us or breaks our feminity, let’s spread the word that feminity is found in a smile, a little laugh or a monstrous hug filled with love. It shows in a woman’s glow on their face. It lives in grace and confidence. My husband married me, when I had a short hair style. The odd thing is that he told me he prefers long hair but it must have not really mattered, for love is love. Now that I’ve grown my hair out past my shoulders, the love remains the same.

Tammy remarks, “Many struggle with no hair due to cancer.” These points are true and worth pondering over. Strong dignified women sometimes lose their hair from harsh cancer treatments. This is not only a physical battle but emotional. Because of women’s learned values concerning hair, I would surmise that it is a profound struggle to expose their loss. Yet, what I see and many other people see is that these women are stunning…without hair. Their beauty is not defined by hair, but beautifully shaped heads, powerful eyes (the windows to the soul),and facial features like cheek bones. This deep beauty lives in their everyday strength to fight.

Let’s start a hair revolution of acceptance and love for what we have! When women peek in the mirror, Tammy and I wish for them to love their hair. If one simply can’t accept what it is, then change it! If you crave a change, take the giant leap that Tammy took, what do you have to lose( but a little hair) ? Remember that hair is simply hair…straight, curly, shoulder length or short and sassy. It doesn’t define you or how feminine you are, you do that on your very own!

All My Best,

Heart and Soul